A True Cinematic Masterpiece
I don’t know if I could type a good enough introduction to this entry, so I instead will use this large image to convey my feelings:
Yeah. It really was. Super awesome, even. If you haven’t seen it yet, go see it now. This movie is actually worth going to the movie theatre and paying money to see. It is that awesome.
After months and months of hype, I was so ridiculously excited to see this movie. I think perhaps even more excited than I was to see the Ninja Turtles or Power Rangers movies back in the day. The filmmakers knew that this film was going to only have a chance of survival on said hype, and I think their decision to go back and edit the film into an R-rated one was well worth it. If anything, they got to also re-edit it and make it an awesome movie for the fans. There were no boring, long “let’s build up these characters” moment; it was instead “here are some people. They will all get attacked by snakes…now.” Well done sirs, well done indeed.
There will be some spoilers in this post, but it’s not like any of the movie is actually a surprise. In fact, the poster or trailer for Snakes on a Plane pretty much gives away the entire premise and plot: Samuel L. Jackson is stuck on a motherfucking plane with some motherfucking snakes and has to kick some ass. Pardon my language. I enjoyed how the movie starts off like every movie shot in the 80’s, with some peppy music and beach/bikini shots. Before the intro music is done, we have met this dirtbiker guy, who witnesses the murder of some lawyer at the hands of some gangsters. And to make this even better, the gangsters are Asian gangsters. I mean, who else would think to kill an incriminating witness by filling his plane with poisonous snakes. Anyway, that is the plot. Samuel L. is an FBI agent escorting dirtbiker guy to LA, and on the flight over they have to fight tons and tons of snakes. Throughout the course of the ride, all kinds of stereotypical characters get killed by snakes, including snooty British guy, hippies having sex, fat lady, and old stewardess. See? Even the filmmakers agree that there shouldn’t be old stewardesses.
There really isn’t much more to say, just please go see this movie immediately if you haven’t yet. It might not win any Oscars or set any box office records (although that would have been absolutely amazing), but this movie was just what the industry needed. I’m sick of all these stupid remakes, sequels, and books-turned-into-movies. All we need is snakes, a plane, and an angry black guy who curses a lot. Cinematic gold.